Fifteen years ago, just before my daughter was born, I was looking for a coach – someone to help me sort out the stressful situation I called a career. “The thing is,” said one of his references, “if you’re going to work with Jerry, he’s going to make you do the work.”
I hired Jerry Wiley and it was hands down the best decision I have ever made in business. Jerry helped me find my way through at least five meaningful career moves, a divorce, and a half dozen relationships. He helped me feel good about what I wanted to be – as a boss, as a father, and as someone who wanted to make the world more compassionate. He taught me how to be a coach and develop others. Particularly valuable to me, he helped me learn how to believe in myself.
Jerry was a coach, mentor, friend and a second father of sorts to me. My father taught me to be kind and compassionate and vulnerable. Jerry taught me to resist the things that made me angry and sad and mean.
Over the years, he made me and more than a dozen colleagues do the work.
In September I hadn’t heard from him in a few weeks so I sent him an email to see if I somehow forgot he was going on vacation.
“Peter, it’s not good,” came a voice through the phone a few days later. “The cancer is back and it’s spread to Jerry’s brain. They gave him six months. He has come home to hospice.”
I talked to Jerry twice after that. The first time he promised he would be back to Colorado in a few weeks for a lunch and a coaching session. By the second call, I wasn’t so sure. I told him I loved him before hanging up the phone. I told him how grateful I was for everything he offered me and the colleagues I love.
I sent him voice memos, giving him the weather from the foothills above Boulder. I read to him from the daily devotional he gave me a decade ago.
Jerry passed away peacefully two weeks ago.
On the day he passed I felt connected to him and the work we have done together.
I was visiting my favorite client, delivering a presentation that was 10 years in the making. I listened to Jerry’s advice. I did the work. “Peter, slow down,” he would say. “When you do your best work, you will make the world better and you will never worry about paying the rent. I believe in you.”
Jerry, I did the work. I’m doing it. I’m so grateful for the gift you’ve given all of us.
I’m going to plan a Colorado memorial service for Jerry in a few months. If you’d like to be kept in the loop., send me a note.
Hi Peter, I’d love to be kept in the loop about a celebration for Jerry. I know him from Portland. Thanks so much for doing this.
Peter,
Thank you for your beautiful words.